“Happiness can only exist in acceptance” – George Orwell
Paradoxically, it’s so often the case, that our emotional ills are the result of wanting to alter a mood or feeling. We might feel down and sad – or we might be at a loss to pin any kind of description on how we feel – yet what we do know is, we’d rather feel different. We want to feel happy, calm and at ease with ourselves, of course we do. However, the more we want to change our mood, the more it seems to persist. In fact, our discomfort only raises our awareness of just how miserable we feel.
We all know the most common and easy path to changing how we feel, yet food, alcohol or whatever our particular poison, will never be the wholesome solution
There’s no doubt that opening a bottle of wine has become one of the accepted solutions. I’ve certainly been in that place, and only stopped when the excess acid in my stomach started to feel like a knife wound. For me, choices became limited. I knew my lifestyle was harming me. As with the majority, my reasons for drinking, were related to powerlessness. I felt powerless to change, not only in how I felt, but also with the situation I’d found myself in.
It may seem odd to state that alcohol awards us power, yet this is certainly how it feels at the time. Alcohol alters our consciousness, emboldens us, and helps us feel more confident; reducing our inhibitions. Get too far into that bottle of wine though (or the second or third), and rationality starts to go out the window. Our consciousness becomes so distorted we begin to lose our critical faculties. Never a good place to be.
Let’s compare this to a crisp winter’s morning. In the cold light of day we say: “never again” we understand the illusion
We can easily understand why we might eat and drink to excess. After all, who wants to feel miserable? We go with the flow and what becomes the accepted norm is simply that: the accepted norm. The wholesome answer is very unlike the accepted norm, and as such, feels like a challenge. And indeed it is, yet who said this was going to be easy? If that’s what you’re being told, you’re being lied to.
As long as we need to be like everyone else the swim upriver will be hard. It’s only when we move into the quieter, calmer waters of solace, do we accept
If we’re going to learn how to feel happier, with less external stimuli, there is a certain mindset we must adopt. When we know how to meditate daily, there comes a point, when we begin to recognise the power of acceptance.
Our moods are there for good reason
Feeling unhappy may well be the minds attempt to get us to stop. At times the mind needs reflection. The shifts in mood we experience are there for good reason and we must acknowledge this. Seeking to change ourselves through the accepted norms only adds to our burden. Whereas a brief period of reflection, can lead us to an acceptance that whatever it is we’re feeling, it’s okay to feel it. You’re okay. Recognise the illusions that have become the accepted norms.