Mainstream, standardised education, is for the masses. That’s fine if you’re happy being considered one of them. However, what if you’re looking for something different, that stretches your thinking, enabling you to further escape the masses?
When we think about standardised education, be it from religion to geology, we’re all expected to have the same viewpoint on these and many other subjects. When this is the case, it becomes harder for us to expand our minds, beyond the confines of this standard. We all become standardised. Above average becomes increasingly rare when we’re not encouraged to think differently.
“Geology, for example, may hold hidden understandings that reveal themselves through above average lessons”
So, staying within the area of our particular expertise, when taught en masse, that most relationships follow a particular course, it becomes hard for us to deviate from this teaching. We all have a tendency to follow the path of least resistance. This path is the established thinking society teaches us. If we want to witness societies teachings, all we need do, is watch the drama of the average soap opera. What if there were no ‘drama’ in relationships and just love?
“Our expectations will always be fulfilled.”
On a conscious level our minds may expect relationships to be magical, almost like the childhood teachings of princes and princesses, who live happily ever after. We may believe – as religion and some of the biggest box office hits of the century teach our children – that love is self-sacrifice. So, when we talk of expectations being fulfilled, we’re talking of our unconscious expectations. They may differ greatly from our conscious ones.
The fulfilment of these unconscious expectations does of course take time. At first all is well, and our conscious dreams of a loving, magical relationship, are a living reality. As we tire though, and get to know each other better, our unconscious expectations and beliefs begin to surface. These beliefs are the ones society and our upbringing have taught us. We may have thought: I’ll never be like my mother/father, and yet time passes and we become them.
“Education for individuals teaches a different model of relationships to that taught the masses.”
The ability to question if our unconscious expectations, actually match our conscious ones, means we break free from potential conflict. Take the ‘Frozen’ teaching (the film) that love is self-sacrifice. This belief will never stand the test of time. If we should try and fulfil such a demanding belief, our relationships will be a constant and unnecessary strain, and challenge.
“We can never possibly empower someone through sacrificing ourselves.”
What this actually teaches is inequality. To sacrifice ourself (our happiness or life) would be to place someone else’s life or happiness in a higher place than our own. We must never teach this to our children, if we do, in their eyes, we undervalued ourselves. This is no way to gain the respect of our children. We gain respect by teaching equality, we say:
“My happiness is just as important as yours.”
The reality is, if we’re to be happy, none of us can sacrifice ourselves. We are all one and equal. Self-sacrifice is an illusion of love.
In time, many, if not most of the people in relationships, become focused on finding ways to stay in control of each other. We do this to ensure our relationships last. We’re raised with the expectation that this is how we must behave. Many couples are together simply because their fear of loss, is greater than their self-love, and self-respect.
“Be educated as an individual, recognise these traits within you, and change them.”
We must do this, because so often it’s the methods we use to strengthen our relationships, that actually weaken them.
In direct opposition to control, the more we truly love those around us, the more we simply want to empower them, setting them free. Games for control always spell the beginning of the end.
Do you want something different to the average?